


Could He Be More?

by afteriwake



Series: Evening Twilight [3]
Category: Bleach
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-16
Updated: 2012-10-16
Packaged: 2017-11-16 10:39:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/538561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afteriwake/pseuds/afteriwake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She wasn't sure how she felt about Shiro-chan, but she suspected it was more than just friendly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> **moezychan** made a HitsuHina fan video (with the song "According To You" by Orianthi) that inspired this fic. The song choice especially influenced this fic, as this is more about Hinamori’s thoughts about the differences between Aizen and Hitsugaya.

She figured out the exact moment she finally got free of Aizen’s control, once and for all. It was a moment when she realized that she could care about someone else the way she had cared about him. It was such a tiny moment, but it was significant, at least to her. She had gone to the 10th Division headquarters to say hello to Matsumoto when she spied Hitsugaya taking a nap on the couch. She entered very quietly and went over to him, smiling to herself. He looked so cute, she thought. Then she looked a little more closely and realized it was more than just “he’s cute.” He was…he was…

Before she could marshal her thoughts on the subject Matsumoto burst in, causing Hitsugaya to sit up and start growling at her, both of them ignoring Hinamori until she went to make her escape. “Hinamori,” Hitsugaya said, turning to look at her. “Did you need something?”

She shook her head. “No, I just wanted to say hello to Rangiku-san and remind her about the next Women’s Association meeting.”

“Oh. Well, that’s fine,” he said. “Just…do it outside. And Matsumoto, let me rest. I don’t care if this means you take the paperwork somewhere else.”

Matsumoto nodded and gave him a smile as he went to lay back down. Then she inclined her head towards the door and waited for Hinamori to join her. When the two women were outside the door, Matsumoto laughed. “I was expecting him to make me buckle down and do that entire mountain of paperwork. Thank you for distracting him.”

“I didn’t mean to,” she said.

“I know.” She gave Hinamori a big smile. “Come on. Let’s go get something to eat.”

\--

They ended up in Matsumoto’s quarters, and Matsumoto prepared something for them to eat. She paused in her cooking at one point and looked at Hinamori. “Can I talk to you about something personal?”

“Okay,” Hinamori said with a nod.

“Do you know how much my Captain cares about you?”

She froze. “He’s a friend,” she said quietly.

“It’s more than that,” Matsumoto said. “After the fighting, after…” She watched Hinamori clutch her chest. “After that, he felt so guilty. I had to pry information out of him, mostly by telling him he was letting his duties as Captain slip. The guilt was overwhelming him. And then you forgave him, and I noticed a great change in him. Your opinion of him matters greatly.”

“It wasn’t his fault. He was manipulated,” Hinamori said. “I couldn’t blame him for something that he didn’t know he was doing.”

“Who do you blame?” Matsumoto asked gently.

“Aizen,” she replied quietly.

“I see you no longer call him Captain,” Matsumoto noted with a nod.

“It took me a while to see, but…he was an evil man. The next person I call Captain of my division will be a true Captain, not someone who is living a lie.”

“And will you trust him?”

“He’ll have to earn my trust,” Hinamori said.

“That is good to hear,” Matsumoto said with a smile. “It means you’ve moved on and grown up a bit.”

“Yes.” Matsumoto went back to getting them something to eat when something else struck Hinamori’s mind. “Rangiku-san?”

“Yes?”

“What does Hitsugaya-kun think of me?”

Matsumoto paused in her task again. “Well, he cares about you deeply,” she said. “I think he was proud of you for entering the fight against Aizen. And he seems to have nothing but good things to say about you, unless you’re teasing him and he gets irritated.” She then smiled. “Our fourth seat said something disparaging about you while he was around and Captain Hitsugaya really yelled at him over it. He was singing your praises in a way, and then he followed it up with a threat.”

“What threat?”

“That if anyone showed you any disrespect they would have to answer to him personally. I think the implied threat was that he would make their lives hell.”

She was surprised. “I know he’s said he will kill anyone who makes me bleed, but I didn’t realize he would protect my honor as well.”

“You are very important to him. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say his feelings run deeper than mere friendship.”

“No, that’s not possible,” Hinamori said, shaking her head. “I’m still Bedwetter Momo to him.”

“I don’t think so,” Matsumoto replied. “Is it so hard to believe that he may care about you that much?”

“Yes,” she said quietly.

“Then pretend I never said anything,” Matsumoto said. She smiled at Hinamori. “The food’s ready. Let’s eat.”

Hinamori smiled back, but in the back of her head thoughts whirled. Was it really so hard to believe that he cared about her as more than simply a childhood friend? Especially when it seemed to her that she was finally starting to look at him as something more? She let the thoughts fall back into the recess of her mind to concentrate on the food and Matsumoto’s steady stream of conversation. Later. She would think about it later.


	2. Chapter 2

She had a hard time sleeping that night. Her mind cycled between memories of her and Aizen, and memories of her and Hitsugaya. It was like her mind was at war with her heart, even though she _knew_ she had let go of her past with Aizen. Still, something somewhere wanted her to remember.

She was tired of it, she thought as she woke up for the third time in six hours. She would not let Aizen win. He was gone now, he was far away and he could never hurt her again. The specter of his memory would fade, she knew that, but she needed something to push it out of the way. Something, _anything_.

It was too early to go to work, and she had already done her Lieutenant’s report so there was nothing to do there. Perhaps…well, Hitsugaya had always been an early riser when they were children. Perhaps that held true now? But no, it would not be proper. And besides, what would she say? She didn’t even know how she felt yet, or how she would tell him once she figured it out.

But maybe Rangiku-san was awake, she thought to herself. And with that, she began to get dressed.

\--

Matsumoto rubbed her eyes as she opened the door. It wasn’t that she’d been sound asleep as it was that the nightmares had struck again and she’d been _trying_ to go back to sleep. She had known that maybe in an hour and with another large cup of sake she would be able to sleep again, but the knock had put her plans on hold. “Hinamori,” she said with surprise. “What are you doing here so early?”

“I can’t sleep,” she replied.

Matsumoto looked at her and thought for a moment. “Nightmares?”

“No, not exactly.”

Then it hit her. “It’s about what we talked about this afternoon, isn’t it?”

“Yes,” she said with a nod.

“Come in, come in,” Matsumoto said with a yawn as she moved out of the doorway. “Now, let’s sit and talk. After I get a cup of sake, though.”

Hinamori went and sat down on her couch and waited. After a few moments Matsumoto came out with two cups. “I don’t drink sake,” she said, her eyes wide.

Matsumoto laughed. “No, yours is water. I figured you might like something to drink as you get this all out.”

“Thank you,” she said, taking the cup and having a sip. “I…I think I care for Hitsugaya-kun as more than a friend, but I don’t know what to do. I spent tonight thinking about him and about _him_ and I’m confused.”

“You poor girl,” Matsumoto said. “Aizen was a bastard, and he managed to hurt you badly. And not just with a sword. Am I right?”

She nodded, her fingers clenching around her cup. “I cared for him so much. I would have done anything for him. He was…he was my Captain. And I felt more than friendly feelings for him, too. What if I make another mistake?” She looked down. “I can’t make another mistake like that.”

Matsumoto set her cup down on the table and gently pried the cup away from her fingers, and then placed her hand under her chin and lifted her head up so they were looking at each other. “Hinamori, listen to me. Captain Hitsugaya would _never_ hurt you intentionally. He would _never_ lie to you. He would rather die than do that. Don’t you know that? That’s why he felt so guilty over his actions in the Winter War. He caused you pain, and it was eating him up inside that you would never forgive him.”

“I know,” she said sadly. “But…”

“But what?” Matsumoto said gently.

“If Hitsugaya-kun doesn’t feel the same way towards me I don’t think I could handle that.” She moved her head slightly so Matsumoto was no longer holding her chin up and looked down again. “I would be so embarrassed, and I would rather suffer in silence than have that happen.”

“How about if I broach the subject and tell you what he says?” she said. “If he doesn’t feel that way towards you I will tell you, and then I will keep your secret.”

“You would do that?” Hinamori asked.

“I like both of you, and to be honest, I think a relationship between the two of you would be something that would make both of you happy, and we need things that make us happy. And besides,” she added with a smile. “I like to play matchmaker.”

Hinamori smiled at her, her eyes tearing up slightly. “Thank you, Rangiku-san.”

“Oh, don’t cry,” she said. “This is nothing to cry over. I’m just doing what a good friend would do.”

Hinamori dashed away the tears with the back of her hand. “I apologize.”

Matsumoto smiled. “No need. Now, perhaps we can talk a bit about other things. I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep for a while, so it would be good to fill it with good conversation.”

Hinamori’s smile grew. “What would you like to talk about?”

“Anything,” she said. “Heard any good gossip lately?”

“Yes,” she said with a nod, and suddenly found herself talking about Hisagi and Nanao and the fact that someone swore they saw him sneaking out of her quarters early one morning, relaxing into the couch and letting her mind be free of the struggle that had kept her tossing and turning almost all night.


	3. Chapter 3

Hitsugaya was at work, trying to pare down the mountain of paperwork that Matsumoto had let build up. He spent more of his time doing paperwork than he did anything else these days. In a way it irritated him, but it was better than being at the front lines of a war. He would take paperwork any day over reliving what he did, like he usually did when he was alone. She may have forgiven him, but he was still having trouble forgiving himself.

“Do you like Hinamori as more than a friend?”

Hitsugaya’s jaw dropped as he looked at his Lieutenant, who had planted both hands on the desk and leaned forward slightly. “What?”

“There’s no point in beating around the bush,” she said. “Do you or don’t you?”

“That…that…that’s none of your business!” he said.

“Yes it is,” she said.

“You are not going to get an answer out of me,” he said, glaring at her. “It’s a question that doesn’t need to be answered.”

“But it _does_ ,” she said. “It’s important.”

“You are not going to manipulate me into answering the question by telling me I’m not fulfilling my Captain duties again, either.”

“Oh, that’s not how I’m going to get an answer out of you,” she said, raising one hand and waving it slightly. “I’m just going to keep asking until you tell me just to get me to shut up.”

The glare turned to a speculative look. “Why is this so important to you?”

“I can’t say,” she said. “Just…please trust me on this.”

He raised an eyebrow. “You’re prepared to badger me over this and you won’t tell me why?” He thought for a moment and then something occurred to him. “Did she ask you to ask me?”

Matsumoto’s other hand went off the desk, and she was wringing them slightly. “Well…not exactly…”

“Why can’t she just ask me herself?” he asked. His tone was not one of irritation as much as it was one of surprise.

“She…it…it’s complicated,” she said with a sigh.

He scowled slightly. “It has to do with Aizen, doesn’t it?”

“Yes,” she said.

“He’s been locked away for six months and still he makes her suffer,” he said, shaking his head. “If I could kill him all over again I would,” he added quietly.

“But, you do feel more for her than just friendship?” she asked.

“Matsumoto, I know that you’re trying to get an answer for this to give to her, and I won’t give you one. If she wants an answer I want her to ask me myself,” he said with a weary sigh.

Matsumoto looked dejected. “Then you’ll probably never hear from her about this.”

He knew surprise was etched on his face but there was nothing he could do about that. “Is she afraid of me?” he asked.

Matsumoto shook her head. “She’s afraid of making another mistake.”

“What mistake did she make before?” he asked, confused.

Matsumoto looked surprised. “For a genius you’re kind of dense.” He glared at her but she didn’t let it affect her. “She was in love with Aizen. Didn’t you know that?”

“I knew she cared for him a great deal and was hurt by his betrayal,” he said. “I didn’t know the feelings ran so deep.”

“They did. She may not be in love with you but she cares about you a great deal, and she doesn’t want to be rejected. She said she’d rather suffer in silence than be embarrassed.”

Hitsugaya thought about that for a moment. “Tell her I would like to talk to her tonight.”

She looked at him, her gaze firm. “If you plan on telling her that you don’t care—“

“Matsumoto. Just…tell her I want to talk to her.”

She looked at him and then nodded. “Where and when?”

“Tell her to meet me where we used to spend time together when I was a student, and to be there at six.”

“I will,” she said, going for the door. She paused when her hand was on that handle. “Captain?”

“Yes?” he said.

“Don’t hurt her.”

“I would never hurt her,” he said, anger creeping into his voice.

“I just wanted to remind you.” And with that, she left, leaving Hitsugaya alone with his thoughts. Now he just had to figure out what to say to her. He was no good in these kind of situations, he knew, but…he had to try. It would hurt her more if he didn’t.


	4. Chapter 4

“He knows,” Matsumoto said. “I didn’t tell him, he figured it out on his own.”

Hinamori looked scared. “Oh no!” she said.

“I think…I think it might work out in the end, though. He wants to see you tonight, at six, where you used to spend time with him when he was a student.”

“But…if he tells me he doesn’t care for me like that…” She hut her eyes, and when she opened them tears were leaking out of the corners a bit. “Oh, Rangiku-san, I don’t know what to do.”

“You should talk to him,” she said. “Hear what he has to say before you say anything. He wants to hear about your feelings for him from you but that doesn’t mean you need to tell him first. And if it doesn’t work out…well, come and see me tonight.” Then she paused. “And even if it does work out, come and see me tonight. I’d like to know.”

“All right,” she said, taking a deep breath and brushing away the moisture in her eyes. “Thank you for telling me.”

“You’re welcome,” she said before she left. Hinamori looked at the clock and sighed. “Two more hours,” she said quietly to herself, her shoulders slumped slightly. How she would pass the time without turning into even more of a nervous wreck she didn’t know.

\--

She got there early. Not too early, but enough that she was able to watch the sun start to set behind the walls that separated the shinigami from everyone else. It was a little chilly on the rooftop, but she realized that it might be nerves that were making her shake more than the cold.

Within a few moments she heard a sound from her side and turned to see Hitsugaya walking towards her. She stood up and waited while he got closer. “You were here early,” he said.

“I just finished early and I just thought I’d watch the sun set,” she replied quietly.

He looked at her for a moment and then looked towards the setting sun. “Hinamori, I would like to talk to you about something tonight.”

“I know,” she said, turning to look at what he was looking at.

“I have known you for a long time,” he said, not turning to look at her. “And I care about you. But…”

“I know,” she said sadly, looking down.

He turned to face her. “What do you know?” he asked.

“That you don’t care about me as more than a friend,” she said.

“That wasn’t what I was going to say!” he said, irritation creeping into his voice.

Her head snapped up. “What?”

“I wasn’t going to say that. I was _going_ to say that I’m still not sure how I feel about you but that it’s probably the same way you care about me,” he said, a slight scowl on his face. He saw the look of shock on her face and mentally kicked himself. “That wasn’t how I wanted to tell you.”

“You do? You care about me like that?”

“I’m not completely sure,” he said. “I know I want to protect you, and that I want to spend more time with you than I do, and that—oof.“ He stopped talking as he felt two arms wrap around him. “What?”

“I didn’t think you cared about me like that at all,” she said quietly. “Even if you’re not sure, you don’t dislike me.” She pulled away from him, a warm smile on her face.

He looked at her for a moment, a small smile settling on his lips. “I could never dislike you, even when you tease me. It may aggravate me, but it doesn’t make me dislike you.”

“I’m glad,” she said.

He let his gaze travel towards his feet as he ran a hand through his hair. “I’m at a loss to know what to do next.”

“Why don’t we just watch the sunset?” she said. She sat down on the roof and then motioned for him to sit next to her when he looked up. He moved over to her and sat down next to her. After a moment, she reached over and took his hand, holding it between them. He looked down at it for a moment and then back at the sunset. They watched in silence until the last rays of the sun disappeared from the sky. “That was nice,” she said, turning to look at him.

“Yes, it was,” he said, looking at her. “We should do this again, if there’s time.”

“I would like that,” she said with a nod and a smile.

He looked down at their still entwined hands. “Do you have any plans for this evening?” he asked.

“Only to visit Rangiku-san,” she said.

“She would want to know,” he said in a slight growl.

Hinamori laughed. “Well, I’ll have good news to tell her, so it will be a good visit.”

“I was wondering if you might want to…talk a bit, first.”

“I would like that,” she said with a nod. “What do you want to talk about?”

“I don’t know.”

She thought for a moment. “We could talk about our day, and see what happens from there?”

“That sounds good,” he said with a nod. She squeezed his hand and he felt a warmth settle over him. “Hinamori?”

“Yes?” she said.

He felt himself turning red, just slightly, but his face was warm and he was afraid his voice would shake. “Would you allow me to...kiss you?”

She looked surprised, and in the last bit of light he saw that her face looked as red as his probably did. “Yes,” she said with a shy smile.

He took a deep breath and leaned in at the same time she did. However, instead of a kiss they bumped their foreheads together, They let go of each other’s hands to rub their foreheads, with Hinamori giggling slightly. It didn’t take long for Hitsugaya to crack a small smile. “It’s good to hear you laugh again,” he said.

She let the giggling subside slightly and then she quickly leaned in and kissed him. He wasn’t ready for it but he relaxed after a moment and kissed her back. When she pulled away there was a smile on her face, and she reached over for his hand again. He gave it to her and she moved closer to him, and they began to talk about things. It seemed so normal, so natural, he thought to himself, and he wondered why he hadn’t thought of admitting his feelings to her earlier. But he had now, and this? This was good.


End file.
